“How old are you?” the woman ringing up my mother’s groceries asked. This was years before scanners.
“I’m almost eight,” I answered, figuring that seven years and seven months was closer to eight than seven. In fact, the day after my half-birthday was the day I could officially bump my age to almost-the-next-year.
Decades later, my kids do the same thing. They can’t wait to be the next age, thinking each one will be bigger and better. I have two August babies, so when I think of birthdays, I immediately focus on this month. Their celebrations used to consume my summers; I flip through their baby books to refresh my memory, thankful for my slightly anal recording keeping.
We threw Gwen’s third birthday party in July because her brother was due the day before her birthday. We could have waited; James was seventeen days early.
Two years later, we celebrated with a puppy party for James and a rainbow party for Gwen. I made both invitations and both cakes, but that was before Pinterest upped the ante.
Four years later, I wised up and had James’ party at the pool. I got stupid again and threw Gwen a slumber party, with too many girls who stayed up late making pyramids in my family room.
The celebrations have ranged from laser tag to bowling, with themes as diverse as butterflies, superheroes, and dinosaurs. I used to go all Martha Stewart on a budget for at-home parties, and then I started writing checks and keeping the chaos out of my house.
After the party train ended for each child at birthday number ten, August became a tricky month for me. The birthdays were a one-two punch, reminding me that my babies were on the downhill side of their childhoods. After Gwen’s birthday each year, I try out their new ages on my tongue.
I said, “My kids are seven and four,” and had trouble believing they were so big.
I said, “My kids are thirteen and ten,” and marveled at the fact that they were both in double digits.
photo credit: Josh Barry
I said, “My kids are sixteen and thirteen,” astounded that I now had two teenagers.
Next week I will say “My kids are seventeen and fourteen,” although I feel like there is no way that can be possible. Gwen will be a legal adult next year, and headed off to college. This is where August assaults me, and I have to close the door on those thoughts for now.
For now.
I don’t remember when I stopped answering “I’m almost…” At twenty-one, maybe? Later, perhaps. Definitely by thirty. Age bumping is best left to the young.
Now, I will state my age as the correct number, even the day before my birthday. I will be that age until 11:59 p.m., and under no circumstances would I ever claim to be “almost” a year older. And while my children may still like to age bump, I will not rush into the next year. I will squeeze out every amazing drop of the ages they are now.
Beautiful post, Dana! It is so hard to watch them grow, and so amazing, all at the same time. Mine are now 22, almost 13 (in a couple of weeks), and almost 16 (in a couple of months), and it is so hard to believe that even my baby is going to be a teen. I love seeing their personalities grow with each year, and I am so proud of them. Have a great weekend, Dana!
I love seeing their personalities grow too, Stacey – I think that is one of the best parts of having older kids.
Mine are 11, 8, and 5. I just put my baby on the bus for Kindergarten this morning. I’ve been on the verge of tears all day and this put me over. There sure are a lot of annoying parenting moments, but the sweet ones vastly outnumber them!
Oh, you didn’t read this at a good time, Rabia! I hope the first day went well. I also saw your post on FB this morning – hope the kids are okay and not too traumatized by the lockdown.
Awww, man! Now I’m wishing I had all my little ones with me right now. We’re now in two August baby territories (both of whom were supposed to be born in September…) Soak up every minute of the next few years while you still have a kid or two at home.
One of my August babies was due in September too, Leslie. I guess she wanted a summer birthday!
Lovely as per usual! And happy birthday to your daughter and son. Z’s an August baby too!
All the greatest are 🙂
I say, my kids are seven and eleven..like the gas station! I only get to say it this year!! 😀
So agree with you about squeezing every drop of the ages they are now!!
Seven eleven – love it! Enjoy every second, Roshni.
I’m imagining myself walking around saying I’m 41 and a half :). How true that we can’t wait to grow up and then all we want is to slow it down… This is the first summer I am longing for time to stop and to keep my kids the ages they are (not forever but for a little longer each year). Thank you for so beautifully reminding me to squeeze out every drop xoxo
My pleasure, Nicki…I’m not sure when I started wanting time to stop, but it’s been at least a few years.
We’ve got a birthday coming up Labor Day weekend- my first child was born on Memorial Day, my last on Labor Day- and there have been jokes aplenty about me laboring on Labor Day. It’s kinda funny how the birthdays bookend summer.
Anyway, although I love my littlest and have been better about truly appreciating him (even though he’s number four and I’m very tired), I’m really hoping a visit to Nana and Grandpa’s summer house will suffice for a party. 😉
Great post. Good luck with the August assault.
Thanks, Julia. I hope that visit will suffice for a party too! And happy early birthday to your littlest. My oldest was due over Labor Day weekend, but she decided to come early – it might have been the last time she was early for anything!
Ugh, make it stop! Please!
I love how kids always use their half ages, whereas I downplay my own and my kids’ ages. Up until the DAY before he turned three, I’d still answer Des as two. And Scarlet as five. And me as… blergh agh. (censored age)
I hear you. I never round up anymore, even for my kids. Time goes by fast enough without our help!
Awwwe! Time goes by so quickly sometimes it is good to stop and appreciate life.
http://www.artadorned.com
Very true!
This one tugged at my heart. So, so touching and such a good reminder that…dayum…time flies. Always love reading your stuff, Dana. You are AWESOME!
Thanks, Jill – you’re pretty awesome yourself!
Lovely.
O, how time flies, right?
When people ask me about the ages of my boys, I now HAVE to say, “Um, 25 & 27! And I’m only 40!”
xx
That’s how I feel! How do they grow older, and we don’t?
Loved all the images here of parties and children growing older. I agree “age bumping” is best for the young. For all the reasons you say. No need to rush any of it. Happy bday to your darling kiddos! And happy anniversary of motherhood to you! 🙂
Thanks Mimi!
I’ve always age bumped, but now that I’m 30, I think I’ll stop 🙂
It’s a good time to stop! I hope you enjoy your thirties as much as I did.
Love the concept of “age bumping” and yes, better left to the young! The way time moves through that one sentence, “My kids are…” is so sweet and poignant and made me teary. Here’s to squeezing out all the amazing drops. xx
Yes! I couldn’t decide if that line sounded creepy, but I knew that other moms would get it.
This is really interesting, I’ve noticed the opposite trend in myself. Maybe it’s the fact that I’m approaching forty, but I’ve somehow dismissed my current age (thirty nine) and more surprisingly my son’s two turnes three in my head way ahead of schedule. 🙂 I can so relate to the feeling of amazement at the fact that they grow so fast. Sigh. You’ve described it beautifully.
Thanks, Katia. I feel the aging of my kids more than I do my own…in my head I often feel like that 24 year old who loved being a brand new adult.
33 and 30. Ouch! How did that happen?!?!?!
No clue, Mo. But I know I’ll be saying that sooner than I can imagine!
Isn’t that funny how it works with the rounding? I’m an October baby and most of my friends (born in the same year) have spring birthdays – and they always round me up to their age. Ah, NO – I’m still an age that is less than yours:)! And I’m with you on birthday parties being off property!
I’m an October baby too, and now I like that I’m younger than most of my friends of that same year. As a kid, I hated it!
I think my cohort likes to bump back to 29.
My brother wished me a happy birthday, and asked, “29 again?” Hell no! My twenties were not so fun. The thirties are glorious.
I loved my thirties too – I’d rather bump back to 39 than 29.
Aw!!! This is just precious Dana. I get it… both about the kids and ourselves! You described those feelings perfectly, my friend.
I’m *almost* 48… I just had to say it here. Just to break our rule. lol
You are such a rebel, Chris!
Beautiful! You know two of mine have August birthdays, too. Now that they have passed, I am getting used to saying that mine are 13, 10, and 8. I have a teenager?? My “baby” is 8??? I’m still stumbling over the numbers and cannot imagine how I will feel when their ages begin with 17.
I know…for 18 days I have a 14 and 16 year old, but next week that will change. 17 just seems so much older than 16. Darn August.
Oh, you got me right in the gut! My kids are 5 and 8 so it’s hard to imagine that they will be teenagers one day soon, but yikes. Here’s to squeezing out every last drop!
Yes! Every last drop.
Btw, I have to tell you that a local friend posted a link on FB to a Huff Po article that looked so familiar to me. It was yours (the pool one), and it made me squeal, “I know her!” Of course, I was talking to myself, but it was so exciting to see that in my feed. Congrats!
This is beautiful, Dana. I look at Eve and can’t believe she’s almost two — I feel like she was just born! I imagine with every passing year it gets harder and harder to believe, and while she is more fun every day (and sometimes a bigger pain as well!) it’s hard to stomach her growing older and leaving me one day. I’ll just have to savor each day while she’s little and lets me shower her with all the kisses while I can.
That’s all you can do, Bev – and that’s plenty. Enjoy every second with her!
Lovely post! Age bumping is definitely better left to the young. I think after our 20s we tend to age rewind. Happy almost birthdays to both your kids!
Thank you Julie!
Can’t forget about Mr. Norman!!! Those were some pretty awesome parties , D! Hard to believe our kiddos are in high school and ready to head off to college. We are blessed to have pretty great kids, and just as blessed to have amazing friends to share in the journey !
Yes we are, Amy. I wonder if Mr. Norman still does parties? He seemed kinda old 13 years ago…
I seriously just cried reading how you would say out loud your kid’s ages and how old they are going to be this year!! OMG make it stop. At least, for now, I only have to throw one party for two kids but six seems way too old for me. What am I going to do when they’re 16? Probably cry.
Happy Birthday to Gwen and James 🙂 And you can be any age you want to be!
Thanks, Allie. I remember when six felt old; there are some years where the age change seems bigger than usual. Five to six, nine to ten…yes, you may cry when they are 16, but you will also get to experience the joy of having two amazing teenage sons. xoxo
Oh to squeezing out the every drop of the ages that they are and we are now. This is so lovely Dana. Also *SOB* because ach. I’m an August baby too. And I’m so not ready. But also? What’s the alternative? Thank you.