Most women would say that the worst item to shop for is a pair of jeans. Swimsuits are equally awful. I’d suggest, however, that shopping for a mattress is even more painful.
I was all wild and crazy this past holiday weekend, going to the mall with my mother and helping her choose the perfect stainless steel appliances for her kitchen. After thirty minutes of comparing models, I wandered over to the mattresses while she finished up with the saleswoman.
Sitting on a mattress in Sears is like dangling off the side of a life boat with a gushing flesh wound. The salespeople circled like sharks, darting in close and then backing away. Dart in, dart out.
Because of course one should balance on the edge of a boat with a scarf when surrounded by sharks.
I couldn’t have looked less interested in engaging in conversation, avoiding eye contact as if the salespeople were Medusa. I played Words With Friends, browsed Facebook, and called my sister. One particularly bold shark interrupted my phone conversation to “make sure I was still doing okay.”
I wasn’t planning on shopping for a mattress; I just wanted to sit down while my mother chose between Kenmore Elite and Kenmore not-so-Elite. Then I remembered that we actually do need a new mattress, so I called Matt to ask him what Consumer Reports recommends.
As soon as I got up and started browsing, the sharks smelled the blood. One guy followed me around, hovering no more than four feet away from me at all times. As soon as I hung up with Matt, the guy was up in my grill, asking if he could help and handing me his card. He wanted me to call him to make an appointment, because apparently I am unable to purchase a mattress without the help of specialist.
If the mattress makes me look like this gal, I’ll take it.
Part of the frustration in mattress shopping is the huge price variations, and the renaming of makes and models so that comparison shopping is extremely difficult. How much better is a $1,599 mattress than a $649 mattress, and why are their original prices $3,999 and $1,622?
I cringe at spending so much money on a mattress, and not only because we just purchased a new laptop for my high schooler.
That was fun, too. Matt and I spent over an hour looking at processing speed, memory, and eight million other specifications on twenty million laptops, trying to find one that was a good buy in terms of cost and function.
At this point, shopping for jeans would be a relief.
The complex economic theory of price-per-wear
I didn’t invent it, but I live by it. If my friends remember me for one thing, I want it to be this.
Cost of item divided by times of wear (or use) equals Price Per Wear.
Let’s use jeans and a cocktail dress as examples. I wear the same pair of jeans twice a week for six months of the year, for a total of 52 wears. The jeans last at least three years, so that brings the total to 156 wears.
I don’t typically buy expensive designer jeans, but even if I bought a pair that was $130, I would be paying 83 cents per wear.
That cocktail dress I buy for a holiday party is worn one other time, and only if different people will see me in it and it still fits. If I pay that same $130 (which is still a deal), it ends up costing $65 per wear.
The takeaway
If you are going to use or wear an item many times and for a long time, it may be worth spending the money. That fabulous, trendy shirt that you will only wear for one season may not be the deal you think it is, but the fabulous designer jeans that make your butt look awesome may be worth every penny.
That tangent had a purpose; let’s get back to mattresses.
We have had our current mattress for ten years. We’ve slept on it for 3,650 days, more or less. A $1,599 mattress will cost us 44 cents a day over its lifetime, and less if it’s good quality and lasts longer. That’s half the cost of those great pair of jeans.
Considering that my bed is one of my favorite places in the world, 44 cents a day is a bargain. I’ve had enough of the sharks, though – I’m getting out of the water and shopping online.
Ugh! Mattress shopping is the worst. Our old pillow-top has been showing it’s wear for a while, and I’m dreading looking for a new one. It’s going to have to happen soon though. If you find a place in the Baltimore area that you loved buying one, then let me know!
Also, I love the price per use reference. I do that often, just because it really puts things in perspective. But no matter what the price per use is, spending several hundred or thousands of dollars still hurts the bank!
We bought a new mattress set last summer and experienced the same issues. Hubby, the king of on-line research, did some prep work, which helped. We went “middle of the road”- in the $1000s I think. We’re getting older; our backs need support. I even got the “shark” to throw in a “$75” therapeutic pillow – which I love. 🙂 Good luck!
Thanks Julia! My back needs the support too – I know too well what it’s like to spend the day in pain because of a bad night’s sleep.
Sam dealt with buying our last mattress and he just ordered it online. It’s a great mattress, except for one caveat: it’s apparently not great for belly sleepers, and we both tend to sleep on our stomach. On the plus side, I’ve been doing a lot more slide-sleeping as a result, so if and when I ever have another baby at least I’ll be all set for side sleeping with a pregnant belly! 😉
Very true! I’m a side and back sleeper – sleeping on my stomach hurts my back because I’m old. 😉
Shopping online is really God-sent, unless it’s a new dress store and they have their sizes all lopsided!!
I love your little pricing theory! Quite handy and accurate!
Thanks, Roshni! It does help me decide whether a purchase is worth it.
Hehehe your Price Per Wear system is awesome. So glad mattress salespeople are less sharky here!!!
It’s ridiculous, Lizzi. Worse than car salespeople!
This was awesome! Love the logic and to me it is TOTALLY logical. I used to apply this same logic to overpriced glasses, but now with Warby Parker I can get cute cheap glasses. I was thrilled.
What is this Warby Parker you speak of? I just googled it and now I have to check it out! I have a pair of reading glasses that I don’t use often, but I’d love to get another pair to stash in my purse. Thanks for the tip, Nina!
HAHA too funny (and I totally calculate the price per wear thing) (or maybe I justify spending too much on jeans). We recently bought a mattress and it was REALLY EXPENSIVE and I 1/2-way hate it. It’s got the pillowtop and it’s HOT. For real. Even though we paid for the “cooling system pillow top.” UGH. I LOVED LOVED LOVED my last mattress. It was 1/3 of what we paid for this one bought at Denver Mattress Company (which doesn’t exist here). We had a week to return it and I wish we would have. We talked about it but then thought we were used to is (it’s SUPER comfy when you’re not sleeping when you’re hotter than you are during the normal hours). Ugh. I hate mattress shopping. I’d way rather try on jeans. 😉
Me too! I am putting off the mattress shopping for now, because I just can’t deal with it.
A bargain, indeed. And I love your math here! I was actually interested. Why weren’t you my math teacher??
We needed a new mattress a few years ago and got one. I hope that means we’re ok for awhile? It was a torturous process. Maybe it’s simpler when shopping for just yourself, but with spouses, that could mean different levels of comfort. Argh!
I used to want to be a math teacher! Hopefully your mattress will last a decade or longer, so you’re good to go. I think Matt and I have the same preferences, but it is more complicated with two of us.
Ug, we need a new mattress, too. I’m dreading the shopping. Have you heard about the sites where you can buy a mattress online? I guess it gets delivered in a big box and expands to real size once you let it out of the box. The commercials I have heard say that you have a 60-day money back guarantee and can send the mattress back if you decide you don’t like it. My question is: how would you ever get it back in the box to return it? I’m thinking that I’m stuck with the sharks at Sears.
I’m thinking that too. I’ll just have to put on my big girl panties and get on with it. I have not heard of the expanding mattress – how odd!
A good mattress is worth the price! Although, my brother recently introduced me to the idea of buying foam mattresses off Amazon…
Hmmm, I don’t think I could do a foam mattress – holds in too much heat. So many choices!
I need a new mattress too. And I’ve avoided shopping for one because it’s a tedious process and because of those sharks you mention. They are one of the main reasons I shop online for nearly everything. But I know I have to sit and lie down on a mattress before I decide. Wonder what the sharks would do if I instigated a pillow fight?
I think you should try it! I dread going in to try out mattresses, but I guess I have to do it.
I’ve been buying my jeans from Old Navy since you mentioned them in a favorite things post. So it’s easy now. I know exactly what shape and size to get and I still try them on just in case. But that’s nothing like going jeans shopping without a clue.
We bought mattresses last year. And we looked for MONTHS. To the point, I was trying to make myself believe our mattress weren’t that bad. But it was older than yours. And Christopher’ (OMG) his was older than ours AND it was my husband’s bachelor mattress AND it was used when he got it. Don’t do the math on how long we’ve been married. Crazy though, Christopher’s mattress felt better than ours, I was just worried about the cooties in it. Anyway. so we got new identical sets.
First mistake in shopping for mattresses is laying on the most expensive one. I haven’t forgotten about it. And even though we’d never buy one mattress for $3K or two for $3K, because I know what that one felt like, no other mattress ever compared.
Long story short, I’m not in love with our new 20-year warranty mattresses. Christopher can have his mattress when he moves out. Then we can put ours in his room, THEN we can try again and buy what we want.
That is quite the mattress saga! We like our current mattress; it’s the Westin Heavenly Bed. It’s a pillow top so it’s getting lumpy on the pillow part, and we could just get another one, but I’m not completely convinced. Part of me just wants to buy one online, but I know we should try them out first.
I just had a similar experience with my husband getting a new laptop (thank God Apple has iPads for kids to use!) and we need a new mattress!!! I’m dreading the mattress shopping so I’m doing all the research online and then just buying the exact one I want at the store. I mean, do we really even need salespeople anymore?
We don’t! I read online that mattress salespeople make commission, which would explain their shark-ish behavior. Can we just get rid of commission, and pay these guys a decent wage? It would make everyone’s lives easier.
You had me giggling about the designer jeans and admit though your takeaway is perfect. Oh and by the way, we just got a new mattress after having our old one for over ten years here, as well and splurged a bit, because like you make bed is also one of my favorite places, too 😉
It’s worth the money, but what a pain to choose from everything out there! We still haven’t bought one – I just couldn’t deal with it this weekend.