Say the word “tradition,” and I instantly sing it in my head, Fiddler on the Roof style. They are the customs or beliefs passed down from one generation to the next, although I think the word sounds stuffy and well, too traditional.
I grew up in a small family, where we created our own traditions that punctuate my childhood. Having parties for all our Jewish friends on Christmas Eve, New Year’s Eve sleepovers at my grandparents, watching the Thanksgiving Day parade.
Matt grew up in a bigger family, and they had their own traditions. Spending every Sunday at the family shore home with dozens of cousins, Christmas at his house with dozens of cousins from the other side of the family, crabbing in the summer.
When I remember traditions from my own childhood, they are focused on the holidays. I used to worry about how that would affect my children – would we not pass down traditions because we do not celebrate Christmas?
I didn’t have to worry; our little family of four has established our own traditions, and they ebb and flow over the years. They aren’t huge events; most of our traditions are small, simple joys that connect us and create memories that I hope will live on in my children’s minds as they grow.
Traditions throughout the year
In March or April every other year, we take our family Disney World vacation; we have been going since 2004. Now that college means two different spring breaks for the kids, I’m not sure what we will do. It could be the end of this tradition, but I hope we find a way to juggle the trip with everyone’s schedules.
The major Jewish holidays are in the spring and the fall, and we celebrate with my family. I don’t know how much of a role Judaism will play in my children’s lives as they get older, but I hope they will at least carry on the tradition of holiday dinner.
September brings the annual family fantasy football league draft. Matt, his brothers, his father, and some of the kids (including my two) battle it out for bragging rights. From then until January, football reigns on Sundays. My son opens his basement man cave to the rest of us, and we watch together. Since Matt got season tickets a few years ago, he takes one of us to each home game. I only go to two games, but eventually the kids will be out of the house and that second ticket will be all mine. I’m not sure how I feel about that!
In November, we go to the beach with my family every other Thanksgiving. We run/walk a family 5k on Thanksgiving morning, bring in dinner from a local restaurant, and the girls hit the outlets for Midnight Madness.
In December, we pick a night or two to drive through the surrounding neighborhoods in our pajamas, listening to holiday music and enjoying the Christmas lights.
Traditions all year long
Chocolate chip pancakes on weekend mornings.
Playing cards or games at the kitchen table in the evenings after homework is done.
Singing the Shema with my kids before bed – first in their beds, then in mine.
Daily ice cream or gelato on vacation. The rule is choose one: soft drink at meals or daily dessert. Dessert always wins, and it is always ice cream.
Watching one weekly television show as a family. That show has been Modern Family, Swamp People, Friends and others depending on the season and the whim of the people.
I can’t come up with any more traditions, and neither could Matt or the kids. Initially that made me sad; don’t we do things that the kids will remember when they are adults? Then I realized that these traditions come and go as the kids grow and family changes. That doesn’t make them less important. We may not remember specifics, but we remember a sense of togetherness and connection in our nuclear and extended families. One day our traditions will include my kids’ significant others, and eventually they will create traditions with their own families.
And so it goes, from generation to generation.
Traditions do change over time, some go by the wayside if they no longer make sense in our lives but those are replaced by new ones. I think that, by creating family traditions, we are teaching our kids the importance of connection and being “all in” on something of importance as a way to create memories. I love reading about other people’s traditions! Another great chapter in the “Who I Am” project!
Thanks Mo! We’re in the home stretch now…
I actually can link up to this one! A few years ago I wrote an article for the family legacy center about family traditions. Does that count? We have a weekly show tradition, too. Currently it’s the Goldbergs and Timeless that we watch togethter. On the road trips – it’s Friends!
Of course it counts – sorry I didn’t reply sooner, Allie. I’m watching Timeless too – enjoying it, but I have a feeling it won’t last.
We’re working on traditions too… and I feel like we rely too much on our family’s traditions but they’re both in different states and doing their own things too on the years we’re not there… we’ve got the tradition of going on a birthday trip for Tucker each year as it’s a summer holiday, and it makes sense but we don’t go the same place each year (but maybe the trip is the tradition). And we’ve got after-school scootering, and maybe more traditions than I realize (like the simple bedtime routines that you mention). xoxo
Yep – the little things are traditions, and they have changed for us over the years. I wish I had written down some of them when the kids were little, because I feel like I don’t remember so much.
Chocolate chip pancakes on weekend mornings sounds like an awesome tradition!
It’s delicious!
LOVED this so much! We are taking two of our kids (just two!) to Disney in November. I haven’t been since I was FIVE. Can you believe it? I’m so excited!!
Wow – you won’t even recognize the place! It’s great as an adult, both from your own perspective but also experiencing it with your kids. Have a blast!
HA!! I opened up this post but hadn’t started it yet and I was singing “Tradition.” Great minds.
We do Disney every January/February. Cassidy totally thinks for that money, we should go to Aruba or something. While I agree, it’s just never worked out that way. I think the tradition of going somewhere warm and sunny in the winter should be the real key, no matter where we go.
Now I want chocolate chip pancakes for dinner.
I felt like Cassidy does for awhile, but my kids have always wanted to go to Disney, and it’s just the perfect family vacation for us. I hope one day they’ll invite us along to go with their families, but in the meantime we may just hit the Wine and Food Festival in Epcot as empty nesters!
Our traditions are small and simple too… and also involve chocolate chip pancakes. 😉
Shouldn’t they all?
LOOOoove
your family traditions!
Modern Family is my ALL TIME fave! xxx
Sue ROCKSssssssss.
I love all your xxx’s and !!!’s – your comments always make me smile. 🙂
I feel like if I were to list off all of our family traditions, we wouldn’t have too many, but I think that only makes the ones you do have more special. The Jewish holidays are important traditions for me, but having a small child on the high holidays (particularly Yom Kippur) makes it a little more challenging to do some of those. This year I tried to start a new tradition for Yom Kippur — we’ll see if it sticks! We’re trying to make more of an effort of doing a Friday night Shabbat tradition. I’m proud that Eve already knows what to do when we light the candles! As she gets older, and we hopefully add another child to the mix, it will be interesting to see how these traditions transform.
We briefly tried the Friday night candles – I hope you are more successful than I’ve been. But that doesn’t mean my kids can’t rekindle that tradition (no pun intended).
Aw, what wonderful traditions and many I could even relate to, especially Disney, which as you know we have been doing, but usually a bit later in the year during summertime.
You started around that tradition when your kids were about the same age as mine – I hope your girls love it as much as mine do over a decade later!