When I was a kid, I had a blue binder filled with song lyrics. I taped songs from the radio, and painstakingly played them back line by line, transcribing the lyrics on notebook paper in my fat, curly, teenage girl handwriting. I did pretty well, but every once and awhile I just could not decipher a word or phrase. So I made it up, just like everyone else did in those days.
And then came the Internet. It took all the mystery out of the music. A search quickly yields the lyrics for any song every written, and the game of “What the Hell are Those Lyrics” became obsolete.
Or did it? A few months ago, Jimmy Fallon asked his fans to tweet misheard lyrics. I tweeted my own, and then scrolled through what some of his eight million followers had said. I read some aloud to my husband, and started laughing so hard that he couldn’t understand what I was saying.
Misheard Lyrics
Here is a sampling from my friends and family; the real lyrics are next to the misheard ones in case you need them.
From “Winter Wonderland”, as heard by my daughter:
In the meadow we can build a snowman
And pretend that he is partially brown (Parson Brown)
From “O, Holy Night”, as heard by my son:
Fall on your knees
Oh hear the angel voices
Oh ninety five (night divine)
From “Sugar We’re Going Down”, as heard by my daughter:
We’re going down, down in an earlier round
And Sugar, we’re going down swinging
I’ll be your number one with a bullet
A loaded god complex, cookies and pudding (cock it and pull it)
And Sugar, we’re going down swinging
I’ll be your number one with a bullet
A loaded god complex, cookies and pudding (cock it and pull it)
From “The Joker”, as heard by my college roommate…granted she was inebriated at the time:
You’re the cutest thing that I ever did see
I really love your peaches
Want to taste your cream (shake your tree)
From “Drift Away”, as heard by another college roommate…completely sober:
Give me the Beach Boys (beat boys)
And free my soul
From “Hotel California”, as heard by me:
On a dark desert highway
Cool wind in my hair
Warm smell of coleet dust (colitas)
I have no idea what coleet dust is – I just made it up because I could never figure out what the Eagles were saying. I also have no idea what colitas means, but a Google search revealed that it means “little tail” in Spanish, and is slang for the buds of the cannabis plant. See what the Internet did? No more mystery. I still sing “coleet dust” just to be contrary.
Given the lewdness of many current song lyrics, I sometimes find myself wistful for the days of making up lyrics you can’t understand. Then at least my 11 year old could make up his own age appropriate lyrics to songs he likes, instead of just humming over the ones he knows are inappropriate because we looked them up online. And then he might be innocently oblivious to the lyrics that are at best suggestive and at worst lewd and misogynistic.
A friend of mine was at an event with her five year old daughter, and Nelly’s “Hot in Here” was playing on the sound system. They hear the chorus: It’s getting hot in here, so take off all your clothes / I am, getting so hot, I wanna take my clothes off. The little girl asks her mother what they are singing, and my quick thinking friend replies, “I’m getting so hot, I wanna take my COAT off.”
Sometimes the lyrics we make up are better than the real ones.
What lyrics have you misheard?
LOL! Those were great! My brother used to purposely ruin songs for me. My favorite was Bad Moon Rising:
Original:
Don’t go around tonight Well,
it’s bound to take your life
There’s a bad moon on the rise
His lyrics:
Don’t go around tonight Well,
it’s bound to take your light
There’s a bathroom on the right!
Sorry I’m tardy making it here from the Humor Me! Blog Hop. Life and all that… 😀
Better late than never, Terrye – you had a lot of people to visit! Love your brother’s version of Bad Moon Rising – makes more sense than the original anyway. What is a bad moon anyway?
Elton John songs are just asking to be mis-heard. I know the correct lyrics, but I still sing about “electric boobs” just because I like it that way!!
Stopping by from SITS Sharefest; thanks for linking up!
You are not the only one – electric boobs have been commented on a few times. Have a great weekend, Rabia!
I laughed all the way through this! I remember sitting there all day with my finger hovering over the record button to tape the perfect song. (Always with the annoying DJ either babbling in the beginning of it or cutting it off at the end.)
My favorite for misheard lyrics? Pearl Jam. I purposely don’t look up the lyrics for their songs because it’s more fun to sing my versions.
Yes, I remember the finger hovering! Pearl Jam is a good one for making up lyrics – or just humming along (which is what I usually do).
This made me smile because I am one of those people who sings along with songs every chance I get. There is not telling how many I’ve messed up. Some I’m sure I don’t want to know what they really say. Blinded By The Light….hmmm….what is it really saying. Doesn’t sound good.
I used to transcribe lyrics when I was a teen, too! AHH, those were the days. My husband misinterpreted Macklemore’s lyrics as “like the silly can holders” instead of “So we put our hands up like the ceiling can’t hold us” LOL
Haha – love that! I have to tell my kids that one – they will crack up! Thanks for sharing, Gracielle.
I pretty much gave up trying to learn lyrics when I was 16 and find joy in making up my own now. I tried with my daughter, but she is too good at understanding them now, so I just annoy others with bad lyrics.
Ha – I know what you mean. My kids rag on me all the time for screwing up the lyrics, because they know everything and I know nothing.
Dana, these are hilarious! Love it! How about “Electric Boobs” in Benny and the Jets (I have no idea what the real words are and still sing “electric boobs” during that part. Ha.
Well, we covered this already on Twitter – but I do love a good pair of electric boobs! Those kind don’t sag at all. 🙂
oh my gosh this had me roaring! yes, I used to do the same thing, rewinding the cassette tape over and over til I thought I had it! For the longest time (OK literally til last week when my hubs heard me and corrected me!) I thought MC Hammer’s Can’t Touch This went “with a mind to rhyme and two black feet.” That always seemed strange to me, but I thought he was just proud of his heritage! lol
That’s too funny, Alexa! I couldn’t remember the exact line so I just looked it up on You Tube – I think it sounds like he’s saying “two white feet” which would make even less sense then your lyrics! My husband (and kids) get a little too much pleasure out of correcting me when I have the lyrics wrong, so I tend to hum over ones I don’t know.
Up until the second I read this post I thought it was give me the beat boys..MIND BLOWN!
Lol – you’re right, Robbie – it is “beat” – my friend said “beach.” You can unblow your mind now 🙂
Oh I laughed thru this and had to sing both the correct and misheard lyrics. My dad may think I’ve officially lost my mind.
Hotel California was one of my all time favorite songs!! I sang it correctly but never knew what colitas was, thanks for clearing that up.
Recently my in-laws have been cracking us up with Eric Churchills song Creepin — they were singing Just a grapevine. Oh my goodness we’d laugh but waited a few weeks before telling them they were singing the wrong words.
I don’t know that song, but I just listened to it on You Tube and your in-laws are right – it does sound like grapevine! That’s too funny. Glad you liked the post – it was fun to write and I’m loving hearing everyone else’s misheard lyrics!
Good post! I try to sing the ‘O, Holy Night’ song with the misheard lyric and it sounds hysterically funny. Thanks for the good entertainment.
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You’re welcome for the entertainment, and for defacing a perfectly lovely Christmas carol 🙂
THIS is a fantastic post! My husband is notorious for getting the lyrics wrong…and we make fun of him relentlessly. My fave is from that 80’s song, Here I Go Again. You know, the one that goes: Here I go again on my own. Like a drifter I was born to walk alone. Hubby heard it like this: Like a drifter I was born to wear cologne.
Thanks for the laugh tonight!
I love that song! And we all know that all drifters wear cologne 🙂
I was constantly getting the lyrics wrong when I was a kid, humming and singing things as if I was totally right when I was dead-wrong. Like Sade’s Smooth Operator. I swear I thought she was singing, “School of Loretta.”
Ha – it does sound like that – that’s a good one! You know I’ll be hearing your lyrics next time I hear that song on the Love station on Sirius.
I totally did that – rewinding and listening over and over to write down the lyrics! Sometimes I wish I had the quick thinking skills your friend did when my kids ask me what certain lyrics mean!
So do I, Lisa. I usually mumbled something incoherent or just said it’s not appropriate.
Love, love this!! I too used to carefully write song lyrics in flowery handwriting!! And, totally used to mishear lyrics..especially the Michael Jackson ones! 😀
He was really hard to figure out, wasn’t he? I wish I still had that binder – I would love to see how many lyrics I still got wrong.
Oh, I want to play! I want to play! I want to play! I KNOW there must have been so many lyrics I misheard/understood especially since I wasn’t growing up in an English speaking country but can’t think of one right now! I so love the idea of this post and the notion you present of the internet taking away the mystery and the exploration and the idea of a process in general. It’s true of so many other things, like searching for a term in the encyclopaedia. Loved this post!
If you think of one later, Katia, tweet me. And you’re right – the internet does change things. I can’t remember the last time I used a dictionary – I just go to dictionary.com. Kinda sad in a way.
Thanks for protecting my identity! I still sing “The Joker” with those special lyrics. I think mine fit rather well with the song!
Well now you just outed yourself (first name anyway)! I like your lyrics better than the real ones, and I sing yours too. They make me smile 🙂
Oh, I used to do the same! With my navy blue wire-rimmed notebook. Except even as a teenage girl, I never had fat teenage girl handwriting. More like wiry, tired, prepubescent boy. I am terrible with lyrics. I know that any song that features “deuce” in it..I hear something else.
I used to love playing that game! See the internet is ruining our world. And yes, I could have sworn in the Joker it was taste your cream. Sadly the real lyrics were probably cleaner.
There’s a line in a John Prine song that’s supposed to be “it’s a half an inch of water and you think you’re going to drown”. He has a pretty fun live version where he tells a story of the lady asking to hear the “Happy Enchilada song”. He tells her he’s never written a song about ANY enchilada, much less a HAPPY one. And she says.. yes you did.. it goes like this… “It’s a Happy Enchilada and you think you’re going to drown”. He closes by laughing and replying.. “I’m glad it meant so much to you” 🙂
That’s a good one – at least I’ve never embarrassed myself in front of the songwriter!
Oh I have probably screwed up more songs lyrics then I can even remember or want to remember over the years. Seriously, I have a terrible ear for stuff like this, even though I love listening and singing along (can’t cary a tune thought to save my life). However, I keep on, because of my love of music and you are so right though you can find anything out on the internet!!
I’m the queen of screwing up lyrics, Janine – glad I’m not the only one!
I like my lyrics better than the ones on the radio. I don’t listen to much music, but when I do I sing whatever I hear much to the annoyance of my hubby (a HUGE freestyle and rock fan)
I think my lyrics are better most of the time too 🙂
I’m sure you’ve heard “Alex the Seal” instead of “Our Lips are Sealed”. Great post!
I have actually never heard that substitute for the lyrics, but I love it!
You mean I can look the lyrics up on the internet now? No thanks, I think I will stick to making them up myself! Unfortunately the kids sing along to some pretty awful lyrics…I remember my youngest singing along to that song about the woman that trashed the guys car for cheating. And he knew all the words. I should have kept those kids cds in the car longer.
I know – I wish they didn’t know half the lyrics they do. At least I can look up lyrics online and veto the download of certain songs onto the iPods, though.
My daughter went through a phase of watching ‘The Sound of Music’ over and over again when she was smaller. One time I heard her happily singing “High on a hill was a lonely goat turd…” I didn’t have the heart to set her straight. P.S. I’m a new follower, just saying hi! 🙂
Well, that British accent can be hard to decipher 🙂 Thanks for visiting – I appreciate it!
And you don’t think you could do a MixTape post?! That could have been one there!!!
So, This is mine Think KC and the Sunshine band. “Government Bus Stop of Love” that would be “Roller Coaster of Love” yup… still sing it too, it’s way funnier!
It is funnier – I had that 45 back in the day. I’ll be back to the MixTape eventually…
I purposely have never googled any Nirvana lyrics, because I want to keep some of the mystery alive in our relationship. 😉
Ha – it’s true, some lyrics are better off unknown.
During my years in the 70’s & 80’s radio DJ, it was amazing how many people would call up wanting to know the words of songs. One of the most misquoted lyrics songs ever was Manfred Mann’s Earth Bands version of “Blinded By The Light”. I won’t go into details, as I’m sure you’ve heard it. I’d play Bruce Springsteen’s version of it from time to time just so the words could be better understood. The Doobie Brothers “South City Midnight Lady” also had several lines that created problems. Luckily, it’s popularity was dwindling when I entered the DJ picture. Good post!
I know exactly what you mean with “Blinded by the Light.” I think Elton John is one of the hardest to understand, and I remember trying to figure out a lot of words in Michael Jackson’s Thriller album. I guess no one calls up the DJ asking for lyrics now, huh?
On your curly fat hand writing did you make circles to dot your “I”s. I think that was the style. LOL!
I can only think of lyrics I’ve sang wrong. Bennie & the Jets – “Electric boobs” and there was a church hymn that sang, “The Holy Meek & Mild” and I sang, “The Holy Mickey Mouse.”
Oh yeah there’s this jazz song that sings, “Checkin’ ya out.” I sing, “Check Kenya out.” 😉
Of course I dotted my i’s with circles! Love your misheard lyrics, especially the one you personalized. And I sing “electric boobs” too!