“I am the parent, you are the child. Things are not equal.”
My children hate when I say that, and I say it more than I’d like to admit. I couldn’t stand hearing lines like that from my own parents when I was a kid; I wanted to do things my way. I still want that, but with maturity comes the realization that you can’t have everything you want, and it can’t always be your way.
It can’t, unless it’s February 17th and you use your imagination. Today is My Way Day, some random title given by a random person and posted on the Internet. So it must be true.
If I had my way…
1. Chocolate would have the nutritional value (and calorie count) of kale.
2. It would be unacceptable to wake up before 8:00 a.m.
3. Wishes made when the digital clock says “11:11” would always come true.
4. Vaguebooking would result in immediate banishment from Facebook.
5. High heels would be as comfortable as sneakers.
6. I’d earn frequent flier points for every mile I put on my car.
7. My son would take off his clothes right-side out, and take the underwear out of his pants before he throws them both in hamper.
8. The penalty for misusing the word literally would be a huge wedgie.
9. Bleu cheese dressing would cease to exist.
10. Intolerance would be replaced with acceptance, and compassion would flood the Internet.
Vaguebooking was a new term to me, also. Something we’ve all seen but I never knew there was a name for this annoying behavior. Congratulations on being featured in Mamalode. I loved your post!
Thank you Mo!
Loved this, but had to look up Vaguebooking. I agree, it should be banished from FB! Have you noticed that it’s the same people that use it over and over?
If I had it my way, mint chocolate chip ice cream would be a superfood!
Ooh – yes! Baskin Robbins MCC is my very favorite.
And socks!
Put them socks the right side out!
Confession: I had to look up vaguebooking.
Yes, socks too! I recently learned that vaguebooking was a word, and I fell in love with it.
Down with bleu cheese and the misuse of literally! I’d also love to give wedgies to those who cannot use you’re/your correctly, especially people who say they are writers. Get it right, damn it!
Yeah! I always double check because I’d be horrified to accidentally use the wrong term. It’s and its is hard – my fingers want to put the apostrophe in automatically as I type.
#7!! Wouldn’t that just be the most awesome thing in the world!! And they complain when their socks don’t feel clean because they went through the washer in a ball!! Argh!
I know – or the socks don’t dry because they were in a ball. Sometimes I have half a dozen socks hanging over my banister drying because of that. It’s a real home decor statement.
Substitute my husband for #7, and I am all over this list. Love it!
Yes, my husband does it sometimes too. And I leave his clothes that way.
the 11:11 wish is a good one, of course clothes in the hamper right side out would definitely have to make the list – I am so looking forward to Friday. Chocolate should be nutritional…I know it makes me happy!!!! 🙂
Shouldn’t things that make you happy be good for you? I think so.
#2, #3 & #10 🙂 YES! Before I had my son, I didn’t really function well before 10am, now I just have to ride with it, waking up anywhere between 5:30-7am. Wishes at 11:11 would be AWESOME! 🙂 and YES YES YES to #10…so much negativity in the world today! It saddens me!
Great list Dana! I didn’t even know that there was such a day before I did this link up! My Way Day – 17th February is in my calendar for next year…I plan to have a REAL MY WAY DAY (maybe accomplishing a few of the things that I mentioned in my list :))
I think that is an excellent idea!
If I had my way, my comments would appear on your blog and not go straight to your spam…I used a different e-mail address this time…FINGERS CROSSED!!
Still went to spam, but I caught it. There are a few other bloggers who always go to spam too, so I check it regularly. I’ll always fish you out. 😉
I hate vaguebooking and vaguebookers! LOL I didn’t know there was a term for that. I totally agree with you on #1. I would be soooo heathy if that were true!
The world would be a better place, wouldn’t it?
I HEARTILY AGREE with #1… I have been CRAVING chocolate so bad, I’ve actually been munching on baking chips for lunch. *blush* But I’m pregnant, so it doesn’t count right… right?!?!?! – http://www.domesticgeekgirl.com
Well, I do the same thing, and I am most definitely not pregnant! I think you get a free pass.
Wow. This is one time in which I fully agree with all ten things on a Tuesday Ten! Deeply. And eww to bleu cheese. I hate when you think you’re getting a big bite of ranch, but it’s bleu cheese dressing. That goes double for thinking it’s a piece of fresh mozzarella when really it’s feta.
Ew!
But.. everything else you said is very powerful. Chocolate!
Oh no….ranch is almost as bad as bleu cheese for me. Almost.
Today I did laundry and I asked Christopher to bring me all his white clothes. The next load was colored clothes. When he bought be those, all his white undershirt were still inside the shirt! UGH!
Yes yes yes to #1. I’d definitely have a bowl of M&M’s for breakfast and I’d use a spoon. And OH have you eaten M&M’s on popcorn? Oh and M&Ms with red wine. And M&Ms for snack. Yum. Clearly I could eat a big bag in a day.
I don’t know if you saw Kate Hall’s FB post about her 9 year old over & wrongly using the word literally. Christopher went through that phase too. So bad that I think I don’t know it’s real meaning. LOL!
Ok so what’s vaguebooking? I’m going to guess that it’s when someone posts something like there’s something majorly wrong but they don’t post what happened?
I didn’t see Kate’s post – I’ll look for it. And that’s exactly what vaguebooking is – status updates like “Feeling sad” and that’s it.
YES to all of these! Especially #1, 4, and 8.
I knew I liked you, Christie!
Yes to #1 and #7. It’s quite possible I would get a wedgie for #8. I have to be more mindful to make sure though. Vaguebooking. LOL.
I give you a pass from the wedgie, Tara – but only because I like you. 😉
ooh!! What an excellent way to feature our cause, Dana!! Loved it!!
I haven’t really plugged it yet, Roshni, so I thought this would be a good way.
I loved your piece about finding joy in the gray:)
My boys used to put all of their clothes in the laundry inside out. I was wasting so much time fixing it that it irritated me so I started charging $1 per item that I had to fix – in over 5 years I’ve made less than $10 and most of it was from Chris (husband) not the boys!!!
That’s smart to charge them…I just fold it the way it comes out. My son doesn’t complain, so I guess he just turns them right-side out before he gets dressed.
Thanks for the good laugh, especially the wedgie!!!!!!!! I always say whomever made the work week five days is a dingleberry! Five days, two off?! 😉
Very true, Lindsay. I wish you’d get your way on that one!
I’m literally going over to Mamalode as soon as I finish typing this comment and asking what the heck is vaguebooking???
Posting vague status updates on FB, like “Feeling sad…” without saying why. It’s basically fishing for interaction, and it is annoying as hell.
YES! to #4. Vaguebooking is just being a drama queen and seeking more attention than necessary, Because people are going to ask “what’s wrong?” and Blue Cheese is just nast!
It really is – I can’t do any smelly cheese. I’d starve in France, I think.
Most definitely on #2, 6 and 10! I had never heard of vaguebooking until I read this!! Learned something new 🙂 And #7 made me laugh out loud…literally 🙂 Have a great day, Dana! 🙂
I’m happy to make you laugh, Mike – just don’t make me give you a wedgie!
I have a case of nonstop giggles after reading that now, Dana!! 🙂
Giggles are good!
Yes to all of these! It sounds like if you had your way the world be a much better place 🙂
It would be for me, anyway!
A huge yes to all of those rules. But particularly #7. The lengths I have to go to just to get my son’s dirty close into the washer are ridiculous. While you’re at it, make one about getting all of the stray socks INTO the laundry basket.
Definitely! And of course the stray socks are inside out.
What’s your beef with Bleu Cheese?
The smell is nauseating to me, Sarah. I cannot be sitting next to someone eating wings – it turns my stomach.
I’m with you on all of these (including Bleu Cheese dressing). My five year old has been pulling the underwear and pants off bit, which is just SO frustrating. Hopefully you get at least one or two of your wishes. Can’t wait to read more about #11!
I just fold the laundry the way it comes out of the dryer – he can pull the pants inside out when he wants to wear them. But it still drives me crazy!
Number 6 YES PLEASE! Number 9 – NOOOOOO! Congrats on Mamalode!
Yes! Yes! Yes! to all of these!!!!! I said chocolate would have no calories, but didn’t think about actually giving it nutrition – that’s genius!!! 🙂 And, #6 – I could travel around the entire globe for free 10 times if that were true!
I know – I think most moms could. Chauffeuring my kids everywhere racks up lots of miles!
#1, 4, and 7! Please!! 🙂
You have an inside-outer too, Marie? I bet it’s a boy, right?
Yes so much to #2 and now if only my kids got the memo!!!
They will in time, Janine!
HUGE yes to the last one, followed next in agreement by #8. I had to look up vaguebooking — I had never heard the term before!
I hadn’t either until Tamara used it in response to my Pet Peeves post – it’s the perfect term, isn’t it?
OMG #7! My kids do this at 5 so I’m guessing it never ends. Awesome.
I also really would love the frequent flier mile per car mile. I could be in Italy right now…